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Ant and the Grass Hopper

2006-02-23T05:17:00.000-08:00

CLASSIC VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

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MODERN VERSION...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

BBC, CNN, NDTV show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticizes the Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper.

The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the grasshopper.

Opposition MP's stage a walkout.

Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.

The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by BBC,CNN and NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice".

Koffi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

A SWEET LOVE STORY

2005-10-13T23:20:00.000-07:00

He met her on a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her,
while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him. At the end of the
party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised, but due to
being polite, she promised.

They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt
uncomfortable, she thought, please, let me go home. suddenly he asked the
waiter: "would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my
coffee."

Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but, still, he put
the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously : why you have
this hobby? He replied: "when I was a little boy, I was living near the sea,
I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea ,just like the
taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always
think of my childhood, think of my home town, I miss my home town so much, I
miss my parents who are still living there". While saying that tears filled
his eyes. She was deeply touched.

That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell
out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has
responsibility of home. Then she also started to speak, spoke about her far
away hometown, her childhood, her family. That was a really nice talk, also
a beautiful beginning of their story.

They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all
her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such
a good person but she almost missed him!Thanks to his salty coffee!

Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess
married to the prince, then they were living the happy life...

And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as
she knew that's the way he liked it. After 40 years, he passed away, left
her a letter which said:" My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole
life lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee. Remember
the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted
some sugar, but I said salt it was hard for me to change so I just went
ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication!

I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to
do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything.. Now I'm dying,
I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth: I don't like the
salty coffee, what a strange bad taste..But I have had the salty coffee for
my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for
you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can
live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole
life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again".

Her tears made the letter totally wet.

Someday, someone asked her: what's the taste of salty coffee?

It's sweet. She replied…..

Faith

2005-09-28T04:09:00.000-07:00

One day I decided to quit... I quit my job, my relationship, my spirituality... I wanted to quit my life.I went to the woods to have one last talk with God.
"God", I said. "Can you give me one good reason not to quit?" His answer surprised me...
"Look around", He said. "Do you see the fern and the bamboo?"
"Yes", I replied.
"When I planted the fern and the bamboo seeds, I took very good care of them. I gave them light. I gave them water. The fern quickly grew from the earth. Its brilliant green covered the floor. Yet nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo. In the second year the Fern grew more vibrant and plentiful. And again, nothing came from the bamboo seed. But I did not quit on the bamboo." He said.
"In year three there was still nothing from the bamboo seed. But I would not quit.” He said.
“In year four, again, there was nothing from the bamboo seed. I would not quit." He said.
"Then in year five a tiny sprout emerged from the earth. Compared to the fern it was seemingly small and insignificant... But just 6 months later the bamboo rose to over 100 feet tall. It had spent the five years growing roots. Those roots made it strong and gave it what it needed to survive. I would not give any of my creations a challenge it could not handle." He said to me.
"Did you know, my child, that all this time you have been struggling, you have actually been growing roots?"
"I would not quit on the bamboo. I will never quit on you."
"Don't compare yourself to others." He said. "The bamboo had a different purpose than the fern. Yet they both make the forest beautiful."
"Your time will come", God said to me. "You will rise high"
"How high should I rise?" I asked.
"How high will the bamboo rise?" He asked in return.
"As high as it can?" I questioned
"Yes." He said, "Give me glory by rising as high as you can."
I left the forest and bring back this story. I hope these words can help you see that God will never give up on you.
He will never give up on you!
So… Have faith in God....
Let us journey together in
"Increasing the meaning of life with more awareness in strong belief and get Inspiration For Better Life"
to influences/lead our lives towards Wellness, Harmony and Balance.
Enjoy & Have Fun
Make the Most of Every Moment Count

NO OVERPOWERING

2005-09-05T03:15:00.000-07:00

Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another,or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage.

Actually, this is not the case. There is a saying which carries the meaning that "It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person'scharacter." It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. It would be less painful to change ourselves and lowerour expectations..

CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?

2005-09-05T03:13:00.000-07:00

A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am looking for aspouse. Please help me to find a suitable one."
TheSDU officer said, "Your requirements, please."

"Oh,good looking, polite, humorous , sporty,knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest."

The officer listened carefully and replied, "I understand you need television."

There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband ,because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husbandand the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of thewife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship.Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off,they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bedof roses. The nightmare begins.

NO POINTING FINGERS

2005-09-05T03:12:00.000-07:00

A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praisedyou for a successful marriage. Could you please sharewith me your secret?"

The father-in-law answered in a smile, "Nevercriticize your wife for her shortcomings or when shedoes something wrong. Always bear in mind that becauseof her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not finda better husband than you."

We all look forward to being loved and respected. Manypeople are afraid of losing face. Generally, when aperson makes a mistake, he would look around to find ascapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start ofa war. We should always remember that when we pointone finger at a person, the other four fingers arepointing at ourselves. If we forgive the others, others will ignore ourmistake too.

TRUST

2005-09-05T03:10:00.000-07:00

TRUST is a very important factor for allrelationships. When trust is broken, it is the end ofthe relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicion,suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity andenmity may result in separation.

A telephone operator told me that one day she receiveda phone call. She answered, "Public UtilitiesBoard." There was silence. She repeated, "PUB."There was still no answer. When she was going to cutoff the line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so thisis PUB.Sorry, I got the number from my Husband'spocket but I do not know whose number it is." Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen tothe couple if the telephone operator answered withjust "hello" instead of "PUB".

The first phone call

2005-08-26T01:06:00.000-07:00

The Scene: The Girl is a 23 year old investment banker, working in New York. The Boy is doing his residency in Boston and was given her number by his mother, who is a friend of the Girl's aunt's brother-in-law's cousin's uncle's wife in Chicago.
Time: Monday night, 10 PM

Girl: Hello?
Boy: Shit, she's home! Umm, hi! Is this Pooja?
Girl: Speaking.
Boy: My name is Karan. I don't know if you know who I am. God, what if she doesn't know who I am? I don't even know why I'm doing this!
Girl: Oh, you live in Boston, right?
Boy: Yeah. Ok, so she was told about me, that's some relief. I wonder what she was told - "He's a resident, tall, and fair and he graduated from Ivy League school!". God, she probably hates me already!
Girl: Yeah, my mother mentioned you had my number. I can't believe he actually called!
Boy: So, how are you? Oh yeah, that's real original, but what the hell else I am supposed to say- Umm, hi, I don't know you, but do you want to be my wife?
Girl: I'm fine. And you? Ok, this is off to a great start
Boy: I'm good. Ok, think, think! So, I heard you're an investment banker? Oh, that's a real winner. Now I can be a bad conversationalist and an idiot!
Girl: Yes.
Boy: Ok, she is not helping me at all! Where do you work?
Girl: Merrill Lynch.
Boy: Hey, that's a great firm! I sound like a complete moron. I should just hang up except my mother would somehow find out and kill me!
Girl: Yeah, it's a nice place to work. God, this guy sounds like a complete loser
Boy: So... Stall, Stall!
Girl: So you're doing your residency in cardiology? Like my mom didn't tell me that 500 times already!
Boy: Ok, I can handle this... Yeah, I'm in my second year. Alright, now say something else, but what do I say? Do you drink? Cause if you want to marry me, you can't be one of those goody goody Indian girls who think that if they kiss a guy, they've practically gone all the waySo, what do you like to do in your free time?
Girl: Umm... get wasted... Oh, you know, hang out with my friends, go to movies...
Boy: Where do you like to hang out in NY?
Girl: Shit, what am I supposed to say? This guy could be some religious freak! I can't say bars - I'll say clubs, you can go to clubs and not drink... Oh, sometimes we go to the movies, or there's a couple clubs that are good... That was good, I made it sound like I like clubs, but I'm not really into them...
Boy: Ok, she goes to clubs, that's a good sign. If she was really religious she wouldn't do that. Yeah? I like to dance also.
Girl: He likes to dance- that's a good sign. He can't be that stiff! So where do you hang out in Boston?
Boy: Should I say it? Alright, I'll say it, what the hell! Umm, the same, bars, clubs, stuff like that.
Girl: He said bars! So he probably drinks. Good sign. I should explore this further... Are there any good bars in Boston?
Boy: Yeah, there are some nice ones, I mean, I'm not a huge drinker, but I like having a good time. Ok, that gives the impression of someone who enjoys drinking but is not an alcoholic - pretty good, if I do say so myself
Girl: That sounds really positive. This guy sounds kind of cool. But if he's so cool why is he calling me? Shouldn't he have a girlfriend? Or not need to call random girls his mother tells him about? God, what if he's completely ugly? Yeah, me too. Although I hope my parents never find out.
Boy: Yeah. I know exactly what you mean.
Girl: Ok, so he didn't freak out at the living a double life reference- another good sign. I just wish I knew what he looked like... So...
Boy: Or she could be really fat with a huge mustache. Well, there's only one way to find out! So... I know this sounds a little crazy, but I'm visiting some friends in NYC next weekend and I wonder if you'd want to get together for coffee sometime.
Girl: Coffee. That's totally safe. If he's totally nasty I can have a quick espresso and run like hell! Yeah, that sounds great.
Boy: Alright that went pretty well. Coffee's pretty harmless. And who knows, maybe she'll be cool. Now I have to get the hell out of this conversation... So I have your e-mail, should I just e-mail you soon and we can figure it out?
Girl: E-mail is sooo much better than the phone. Thank God for e-mail! Yeah, just e-mail, I check it all the time at work, so - God, this is getting painful
Boy: Alright, I'll e-mail you soon. Meaning in two days, cause I don't want to look too desperate, but at the same time I don't want to look like I'm trying not to look too desperate
Girl: Cool. Well, I'm glad you called. I think...
Boy: Me too. Well, I'll see you soon. Please be hot, please be hot!
Girl: Alright. Bye. I can't believe he called! Too late to back out now. Besides, maybe he's cool. He didn't sound so bad on the phone.
Boy: Bye. I did it! I am the man. I think she wants me. Yeah, she definitely wants me...

SUNSCREEN by Bazz Luhrmann

2005-08-16T01:48:00.000-07:00

SUNSCREEN by Bazz Luhrmann

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience... I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth - oh, never mind, you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.Don't worry about the future; or, worry. But know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blind side you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other people's hearts.
Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind....the race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.
Remember the compliments you receive, and forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life... the most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives.
Some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40. Maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance.
So are everybody else's.
Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can.
Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it.
It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance.
Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents.
You never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings.
They are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle - because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York city once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise, politicians will philander, and you too will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.Don't expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair; or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it.

Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts, and recycling it for more than it's worth.But trust me on the sunscreen.

What JRD means to me ....

2005-08-10T08:34:00.000-07:00

The people at Infosys have been unabashed admirers of JRD Tata, who sought excellence in everything and pioneered the notion that ethical business is possible in India. A tribute by N R Narayana Murthy on JRD’s 101st birth anniversary.

IREMEMBER a 1970s film called Chupke Chupke, in which the hero (Dharmendra) gets sick of his wife’s (Sharmila Tagore’s), penchant for turning every conversation into a paean for the virtues of her Jijaji. Dharmendra finally decides to teach Jijaji a lesson and succeeds very well at that! My case was not much better: most conversations with my thenfriend and now wife, Sudha, were spent in her extolling the virtues of “Apro JRD”, as she always called him. Unlike Dharmendra, when I got to meet Sudha’s hero, I was bowled, neck and crop, by his simplicity and affection for his younger colleagues.

It was a wintry evening in 1979, when I took a taxi from my Nariman Point office to pick up Sudha, from her office at Bombay House, on my way home. I had been delayed in the office. It was completely dark and I was worried that she would be alone on a deserted road. As the taxi ground to a halt, I saw a tall, old gentleman talking to Sudha. When I got out of the taxi, I met JRD for the first time. His words, which I remember even today, were a gentle admonishment that I should not make my young wife wait in the dark. I believe he saw her waiting alone outside Bombay House when he was leaving the office, and decided to wait with her till I picked her up. I was stunned by this gesture from India’s biggest industrialist to a young and lowly executive in his company. Most great people are remembered for their small acts of courtesy. This is what makes them great. To them, these are natural rather than put-on.

A few years ago, my daughter, studying in the US, wanted to profile an industrialist as part of her course on Leadership. I suggested she profile Ratan Tata. Sudha and I took her to meet Ratan. The perfect gentleman that he is, Ratan gave her two hours as against the scheduled half an hour. During this talk, we asked if ever he saw JRD abandon his principles, even slightly. Ratan was unequivocal. He said the old man always came on the right side of every issue no matter how tough the choices. That, to me, is JRD — a man who had simple values and stuck to them every time. We, at Infosys, have been unabashed admirers of what he stood for. In fact, the first hitech conference room we built in our heritage building, was named the JRD Hall. Of course, we had the privilege of Ratan inaugurating our even more impressive and, perhaps, Asia’s most advanced corporate conference room named after Jamsetji N Tata, a hero to many of us, but particularly to my colleague, Nandan, and Sudha.

Most of what I learnt about JRD was from Keynote, a compendium of his speeches, a gift from Sudha on my 40th birthday in 1986. Many of my own values and opinions were fortified by JRD’s views. In fact, there are only two public figures whose death evoked deep emotional reaction in me. The first was our young, dynamic and idealistic leader, Rajiv, whose ghastly murder deprived India of a fine leader. The second was JRD, who demonstrated, much before all of us, that ethical business was possible in India.

JRD sought excellence in every thing he did. When I irritate my colleagues with my insistence on excellence, I have sought refuge in JRD’s words — I confess to being excessively intolerant of slipshod work and irritatingly insistent on pursuing excellence even in tasks which hardly demand it.

To him, honesty was extremely important even from people who opposed him. He admired and respected people who were honest in voicing their opinion even if he did not agree with him. No wonder, his favourite politician was Jayaprakash Narayan. He had tremendous affection for even fiery union leaders like Prof Bari because they were honest with him. He believed that the high growth rate (he once put it as monstrous growth) of India’s population would be a burden for the country’s stretched resources. He did not lose a single opportunity to call for serious effort in controlling our population. Unfortunately, even today, our politicians do not pay heed to his advice.

HE TOTALLY believed in the welfare state, whose aim should be to assure every Indian the basic necessities of life, the right to work, and the right to earn a decent living. In his speech to the Rotary Club of Bombay in 1970, he said: “In the economic, if not the philosophical plane, a welfare state is the very essence of 20th century socialism to which I subscribe unreservedly”. He did believe there was a role for the public sector but a public sector removed totally from political and bureaucratic interference which has progressively increased over the last 30 years and emaciated every institution of promise in the public sector.

JRD was equally clear about his antipathy for what he termed negative socialism mindset of our politicians and the bureaucratic rigidities “which aimed at and have been aiming at preventing undesirable things being done rather than encouraging desirable ones; at reducing the income of the relatively well-to-do rather than increasing that of the poor; at restraining initiative and action by good elements because of misconduct by a few bad ones; and at pursuing ideological goals, however detrimental to the economy rather than harnessing all forces for producing wealth and taxing them for welfare purposes”. In a speech given by him at a Planning Commission meeting of industrialists in 1968, he said: “In fact, the only fearsome concentration of economic power, that exists today, lies in the hands of ministers, planners and government officials. It is this concentration of power which is a real threat to democracy.”

On communism, he was very clear: “The Indian socialists cling to a 19th century Marxist form of socialism notwithstanding the fact that almost every economic theory and prophesy of Marx has been falsified in the last hundred years.” His belief in corporate social responsibility was pioneering. His sense of fairness and transaction-orientation is something that I have come to cherish and practise. Such qualities generated warmth for JRD in even fiery union leaders like Prof Bari. What would his dream for India of 2030 be? In his lecture — India 2030 A D, delivered in 1981, he envisioned an India which will control her population growth rate; where women will see value in family planning; where Indians will make spectacular success in genetics, molecular biology and other sciences and technologies; and an India which will have reached 6% annual growth rate in GDP. Well, successive governments from Narasimha Rao’s to Manmohan Singh’s have made this possible. If only our communist friends show a little bit of foresight, I am confident we will be able to fulfill the worthy dream of one of Inda’s finest sons.

(The author is chairman, Infosys)

The Cracked Pot!!

2005-08-08T08:51:00.000-07:00

A water bearer had two large pots, each hung on each end of a pole, which he carried across his neck. One of the pot had a crack in it, while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water at the end of the long walk from the stream to the master's house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For two years this process went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots full of water to his master's house. The perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, but the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection and was miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.

After two years, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. "I am ashamed of myself and I want to apologize to you." "Why?" asked the bearer. "What are you ashamed of?" "For the past two years, I have been able to deliver only half of my load because this crack in my side caused water to leak out all the way. Because of my flaws you are made to do all the work, and you don't get full value from your efforts", the cracked pot said.

The water bearer felt sorry for the old cracked pot and said compassionately, "As we return to the master's house, I want you to notice the beautiful flowers along the path." As they went up the hill, the old cracked pot took notice of the sun warming the beautiful wild flowers bloomed on the path. But at the end of the trail, it still felt bad because it had leaked out half its load, and so again the pot apologized to the bearer for its failure.

The bearer said to the pot, "Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side and not on the other pot's side? That's because I have always known about your flaw and I took advantage of it. I planted flower seeds on your side of the path and everyday while we walk back from the stream, you've watered them. For two years, I have been able to pluck these beautiful flowers to decorate my master's table. Without you, he would not have this beauty to grace his house."

Friend, each one of us have our own unique flaws. We are all cracked pots. But if we will allow it, the Lord will use our flaws to grace His Father's table. In God's great economy, nothing goes waste. Don't be afraid of your flaws. Acknowledge them and you too can be the cause of beauty. Know that in our weakness we find our strength.

"..for God everything is possible." Matthew 19:26

If GOD has got u to it,

He WILL get u through it..

PS:

Thanks to Lakshmi who sent this one for sharing with us

Content is Important, not the container

2005-08-03T02:21:00.000-07:00

A group of working adults got together to visit their University lecturer. The lecturer was happy to see them. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. The Lecturer just smiled and went to the kitchen to get an assortment of cups - some porcelain, some in plastic, some in glass, some plain looking and some looked rather expensive and exquisite.

The Lecturer offered his former students the cups to get drinks for themselves. When all the students had a cup in hand with water, the Lecturer spoke: "If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal that you only want the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all you wanted was water, not the cup, but we unconsciously went for the better cups."

"Just like in life, if Life is Water, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold/maintain Life, butthe quality of Life doesn't change." "If we only concentrate on the cup, we won't have time to enjoy/taste the water in it."

Being a Boss

2005-08-01T07:21:00.000-07:00

Scientists at the Rocket launching station in Thumba, were inthe habit ofworking for nearly 12 to 18 hours a day. There were about Seventy suchscientists working on a project. All the scientists were really frustrated due to the pressure of work and the demands of their boss but everyone was loyal to him and did not think of quitting the job.

One day, one scientist came to his boss and told him - Sir, I have promised to my children that I will take them to the exhibition going on in ourtownship. So I want to leave the office at 5 30 pm.His boss replied - O K, , You are permitted to leave the office earlytoday.The Scientist started working. He continued his work after lunch. As usual he got involved to such an extent that he looked at his watch when hefelthe was close to completion.The time was 8.30 p.m

Suddenly he remembered of the promise he had given to his children. He looked for his boss,,He was not there. Having told him in the morning itself, he closed everything and left for home.Deep within himself, he was feeling guilty for having disappointed his children.He reached home. Children were not there.His wife alone was sitting in the hall and reading magazines. The situation was explosive, any talk would boomerang on him.His wife asked him - Would you like to have coffee or shall I straight away serve dinner if you are hungry.The man replied - If you would like to have coffee, i too will have but what about Children???

Wife replied- You don't know - Your manager came at 5 15 p.m and has taken the children to the exhibition.What had really happened wasThe boss who granted him permission was observing him working seriouslyat5.00 p.m. He thought to himself, this person will not leave the work,butif he has promised his children they should enjoy the visit toexhibition.So he took the lead in taking them to exhibitionThe boss does not have to do it everytime. But once it is done, loyalty is established.That is why all the scientists at Thumba continued to work under their boss eventhough the stress was tremendous.By the way , can you hazard a guess as to who the boss was????????He was A P J Abdul Kalam.

Be patient

2005-07-28T02:29:00.000-07:00

A man came out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital.

Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went home & committed suicide.

Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognise the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever . . .

Love and Time

2005-07-28T02:25:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived:Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love. Oneday it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so allconstructed boats and left. Except for Love.Love was the only one who stayed.

Love wanted to hold out until the lastpossible moment.When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help.

Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said, "Richness, can youtake me with you?"Richness answered, "No, I can't. There is a lot of gold and silver in myboat. There is no place here for you."

Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel."Vanity, please help me!""I can't help you, Love. You are a! ll wet and might damage my boat," Vanity answered.

Sadness was close by so Love asked, "Sadness, let me go with you." "Oh . . .Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!"

Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not evenhear when Love called her.

Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come, Love, I will take you." It was an elder.So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they weregoing. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way.

Realizing how much was owed the elder,Love asked Knowledge, another elder, "Who Helped me?""It was Time," Knowledge answered."Time?" asked Love. "But why did Time help me?"Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered, "Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is."

The blue of heaven is larger than the clouds

2005-07-21T02:48:00.000-07:00

A man and his girlfriend were married. It was a large celebration. All oftheir friends and family came to see the lovely ceremony and to partake ofthe festivities and celebrations. A wonderful time was had by all. The bride was gorgeous in her white wedding gown and the groom was verydashing in his black tuxedo. Everyone could tell that the love they had for each other was true.

A few months later, the wife comes to the husband with a proposal: "I readin a magazine, a while ago, about how we can strengthen our marriage." sheoffered. "Each of us will write a list of the things that we find a bit annoyingwith the other person. Then, we can talk about how we can fix themtogether and make our lives happier together." The husband agreed. So each of them went to a separate room in the houseand thought of the things that annoyed them about the other. They thoughtabout this question for the rest of the day and wrote down what they cameup with. The next morning, at the breakfast table, they decided that they would goover their lists.. "I'll start," offered the wife. She took out her list. It had many itemson it. Enough to fill 3 pages, in fact.

As she started reading the list ofthe little annoyances, she noticed that tears were starting to appear inher husband's eyes.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing" the husband replied, "keeps reading your list.."

The wife continued to read until she had read all three pages to herhusband.

She neatly placed her list on the table and folded her handsover top of it.

"Now, you read your list and then we'll talk about the things on both ofour lists." She said happily.

Quietly the husband stated, "I don't have anything on my list. I thinkthat you are perfect the way that you are. I don't want you to changeanything for me. You are lovely and wonderful and I wouldn't want to tryand change anything about you."

The wife, touched by his honesty and the depth of his love for her and hisacceptance of her, turned her head and wept.

IN LIFE, there are enough times when we are disappointed, depressed andannoyed. We don't really have to go looking for them. We have a wonderfulworld that is full of beauty, light and promise. Why waste time in thisworld looking for the bad, disappointing or annoying when we can lookaround us, and see the wondrous things before us..?

I believe that WE ARE HAPPIEST WHEN we see and praise the good and try ourbest to forget the bad. Nobody's perfect but we can find perfectness inthem to change the way we see them. - We are not trying to condone what is bad. Correction does much, butencouragement does more."The blue of heaven is larger than the clouds .."

A Nice Story

2005-07-20T00:43:00.000-07:00

My husband is an Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature, and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.

Three years of courtship and now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now ransformed into the cause of all my restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings, I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce. "Why?" he asked, shocked.

"I am tired, there are no reasons for everything in the world!" answered I.

He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thought with a lighted cigarette at all times. My feeling of disappointment only increased, here was a man who can't even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him? And finally he asked me:" What can I do to change your mind?" Somebody said it right, it's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him. Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered : "Here is the question, if you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind, Let's say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death, will you do it for me?"

He said : " I will give you your answer tomorrow...." My hopes just sank by listening to his response. I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes.... My dear, "I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further.."

This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading. "When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen, I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to show you the way. You always have the cramps whenever your "good friend" approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails, and help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand... and tell you the color of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face... Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do... I could not pick that flower yet, and die.. "

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting... and as I continue on reading... "Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk... I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread.... Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone...

That's life, and love. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away, and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms, even very small and cheeky forms, it has never been a model, it could be the most dull and boring form.. . flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands... and that's our life... Love, not words win arguments...

Copy & Paste

2005-07-18T06:08:00.000-07:00

Not too long ago, a large seminar was held for ministers and reverends in training. Among the facilitators were many well-known motivational speakers. One such speaker boldly approached the pulpit and, gathering the entire crowd's attention, said, "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!" The crowd was shocked! He followed up by saying, "That woman was my mother!" The crowd burst into laughter and he gave his speech, which was well received.

About a week later, one of the ministers who had attended the seminar decided to use that joke in his sermon. As he shyly approached the pulpit one sunny Sunday, he tried to rehearse the joke in his head. It was a bit foggy to him. Getting to the microphone he said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!"

His congregation sat shocked, murmuring. After standing there for almost 10 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, the pastor finally blurted out "...and I can't remember who she was!"

Moral of the story: Don't copy if you can't paste.

The fairy

2005-07-18T06:04:00.000-07:00

A married couple in their early 60s were out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish." "Ooh, I want to travel around the worldwith my darling husband" said the wife The fairy moved her magic stick and ~ abracadabra! ~ two tickets for the new QueenMary2 luxury liner appeared in her hands. Now it was the husbands turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime,so, I'm sorry my love, but my wish s to go on this trip with a woman who is 30 years younger than me". The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish...So the fairy made a circle with her magic stick abracadabra! the husband became 92 years old.

How to Lead a Meaningful Life by Dalai Lama

2005-07-18T06:00:00.000-07:00

Though a lengthy one, worth reading it ...

There are two ways to create happiness. The first is external. By obtaining better shelter, better clothes, and better friends, we can find a certain measure of happiness and satisfaction.The second is through mental development, which yields inner happiness. However, these two approaches are not equally viable. External happiness cannot last long without its counterpart. If something is missing in your heart--then despite the most luxurious surroundings, you cannot be happy. However, if you have peace of mind, you can find happiness even under the most difficult circumstances.

[There are] valuable techniques from the Tibetan traditions which, if implemented in daily practice, lead to mental peace. As you calm your mind and heart, your agitation and worry will naturally subside, and you will enjoy more happiness. Your relationships with others will reflect these changes. And as a better human being, you will be a better citizen of your country, and ultimately a better citizen of the world.
We are all born helpless. Without a parent's kindness we couldnot survive, much less prosper. When children grow up in constant fear, with no one to rely on, they suffer their whole lives. Because the minds of small children are very delicate, their need for kindness is particularly obvious.
Adult human beings need kindness too. If someone greets me with a nice smile, and expresses a genuinely friendly attitude, I appreciate it very much. Though I might not know that person or understand their language, they instantly gladden my heart. On the other hand, if kindness is lacking, even in someone from my own culture whom I have known for many years, I feel it. Kindness and love, a real sense of brotherhood and sisterhood, these are very precious. They make community possible and thus are crucial to society.
Each of us has a valid sense of self, of "I." We also share fundamental goals. We want happiness and do not want suffering. Animals and insects also want happiness and do not want suffering, but they have no special ability to achieve deeper happiness or overcome suffering. As human beings, endowed with this power of thought, we have this potential, and we must use it.
On every level--as individuals, and as members of a family, a community, a nation and a planet--the most mischievous troublemakers we face are anger and egoism. The kind of egoism I refer to here is not just a sense of I, but an exaggerated self-centeredness. No one claims to feel happy while being angry. As long as anger dominates our disposition, there is no possibility of lasting happiness. In order to achieve peace, tranquility, and real friendship, we must minimize anger and cultivate kindness and a warm heart.
Developing a warm heart ourselves can also transform others. As we become nicer human beings, our neighbors, friends, parents, spouses, and children experience less anger. They will become warm-hearted, compassionate, and harmonious. The very atmosphere becomes happier, which promotes good health, perhaps even a longer life.
The central method for achieving a happier life is to train your mind in a daily practice that weakens negative attitudes and strengthens positive ones. The big question is whether or not we can practice kindness and peace. Many of our problems stem from attitudes like putting ourselves first at all costs. I know from my own experience that it is possible to change these attitudes and improve the human mind.
Though it is colorless, shapeless, and sometimes weak, the human mind can become stronger than steel. To train the mind, you must exercise the patience and determination it takes to shape the steel. If you practice improving your mind with a strong will and forbearance by trying, no matter how many difficulties you may encounter at the beginning, then you will succeed. With patience, practice, and time, change will come.
Do not give up. If you are pessimistic from the beginning, you cannot possibly succeed. If you are hopeful and determined, you will always find some measure of success. Winning the gold medal does not matter. You have tried your best.
The harmony and friendship that we need in our families, nations, and the world can be achieved only through compassion and kindness. By helping one another, with concern and respect, we can solve many problems easily. Harmony cannot thrive in a climate of mistrust, cheating, bullying, and mean-spirited competition. Success through intimidation and violence is temporary at best; its trifling gains only create new problems. This is why just a couple of decades after the First World War, the Second World War was fought, and millions more people were killed. If we examine our long history of hatred and anger, we see the obvious need to find a better way. We can only solve our problems through truly peaceful means--not just peaceful words but a peaceful mind and heart.
Is this possible? Fighting, cheating, and bullying have trapped us in our present situation; now we need training in new practices to find a way out. It may seem impractical and idealistic, but we have no alternative to compassion, recognizing human value and the oneness of humanity: This is the only way to achieve lasting happiness.
I travel from country to country with this sense of oneness. I have trained my mind for decades, so when I meet people from different cultures there are no barriers. I am convinced that despite different cultures and different political and economic systems, we are all basically the same. The more people I meet, the stronger my conviction becomes that the oneness of humanity, founded on understanding and respect, is a realistic and viable basis for our conduct.
Wherever I go, this is what I speak about. I believe that the practice of compassion and love--a genuine sense of brotherhood and sisterhood--is the universal religion. It does not matter whether you are Buddhist or Christian, Moslem or Hindu, or whether you practice a religion at all. What matters is your feeling of oneness with humankind.

Do you agree? Do you think it is nonsense? I am not a God King, as some call me. I am just a Buddhist monk. What I am saying comes from my own practice, which is limited. But I do try to implement these ideas in my daily life, especially when I face problems. Of course, I fail sometimes. Sometimes I get irritated. Occasionally I use a harsh word, but when I do, immediately I feel "Oh, this is wrong." I feel this because I have internalized the practices of wisdom and compassion.

I call compassion the global staple. Human beings want happiness and do not want suffering. Mental peace is a basic need for all humankind. For politicians, engineers, scientists, homemakers, doctors, teachers, lawyers--for all people in every endeavor--a healthy, compassionate motivation is the foundation of spiritual growth.

The Turtles

2005-07-13T03:03:00.000-07:00

A turtle family decided to go on a picnic. Turtles,being naturally slow about things, took seven years to prepare for their outing. Finally the turtle family left home looking for a suitable place for their outing. During the second year of their journey they found a place ideal for them at last! For about six months they cleaned up the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements. Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed. After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell. He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned. The family consented and the little turtle left. Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years... six years... then on the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich. At that point the little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting, "SEE! I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt."

Moral of the Story:

Some of us waste our time waiting for people to live up to our expectations. We are so concerned about what others are doing that we don't do anything ourselves.

The Frogs

2005-07-13T03:00:00.000-07:00

A farmer came into town and asked the owner of a restaurant if he could use a million frog legs. The restaurant owner was shocked and asked the man where he could get so many frog legs! The farmer replied, "There is a pond near my house that is full of frogs---millions of them. They all croak all night long and they are about to make me crazy!" So the restaurant owner and the farmer made an agreement that the farmer would deliver frogs to the restaurant, five hundred at a time for thenext several weeks. The first week, the farmer returned to the restaurant looking rather sheepish,with two scrawny little frogs. The restaurant owner said, "Well... where are all the frogs?" The farmer said, "I was mistaken. There were only these two frogs in the pond. But they sure were making a lot of noise!"

Moral of the story :

Next time you hear somebody criticizing or making fun of you, remember,it's probably just a couple of noisy frogs. Also remember that problems always seem bigger in the dark. Have you ever laid in your bed at night worrying about things which seem almost overwhelming like a million frogs croaking? Chances are pretty good that when the morning comes, and you take a closer look, you'll wonder what all the fuss was about.

Why me ?

2005-07-08T04:26:00.000-07:00

Arthur Ashe, the legendary Wimbledon player was dying of positive for HIV. Doctors told him he most certainly contracted the virus by getting an infected blood transfusion in during his heart operation. From world over, he received letters from his fans, one of which conveyed: "Why does GOD have to select you for such a bad disease "?

To this Arthur Ashe replied: The world over 5 crore children start playing tennis, 50 lakh learn to play tennis, 5 lakh learn professional tennis, 50,000 come to the circuit, 5000 reach the grand slam, 50 reach Wimbledon, 4 to semi final, 2 to the finals, When I was holding a cup I never asked GOD " Why me? ". And today in pain I should not be asking GOD " Why me?"

Most Cutest Date

2005-07-08T04:22:00.000-07:00

Grandpa and Grandma always got very excited when they recalled the old days they were together.They made a decision, one day to make it "yesterday once more".

They made a date on the river bank they used to go when they were young.The next day, Grandpa got up at 6 a.m. in the morning, dashed to the bank, picked up a big bunch of wild flowers before sunrise, waited there for his sweetheart to come.

But Grandpa ended up being disappointed, as Grandma never showed up even after sunset. Grandpa went home in such an anger. He opened the door and saw Grandma lying on the sofa with her pillow.
He threw the flowers on the floor and questioned: "Why didn't you come to our date?!!"

Grandma hid her head in the pillow and replied shyly: "Mom didn't allow me to go..."

The Girl

2005-07-05T04:44:00.000-07:00

Amit wakes up with a start. ” Shit, what a bad dream, he thinks.“ He dreamt he was falling in an abyss. He was trying to scream but the scream would not escape his throat. These dreams had become increasingly common since he had lost his job. Bad times for the economy meant that his job had been axed with lots of others.

He goes into the kitchen and brews himself a strong cup of coffee. Coffee in hand he goes into the balcony. “What a life” he thinks,”3 am and I am drinking coffee”

He gazes mindlessly into the darkness of Mumbai. He loved the city, it had treated him nicely and at times shabbily, but overall it had treated him well.

It is then that he notices a light in the apartment exactly opposite to his balcony, separated by a hundred feet of open space.” Another tortured soul like me “he thinks.

The faint strains of a ghazal fall on his ears. Then suddenly as if he has been noticed the light goes out and ghazal stops.

Its morning and Amit gets ready for another day of interviews. He is quite tired of it but a tenacious guy that he is, he keeps at it.

Its evening, he is back with another round of “We will let you know” statements.

His parents have been pestering him to go for an MBA degree. He has applied for CAT and a host of other exams.

“I really should study” he thinks and follows up on the decision.

Its 2 am and he has been studying for the last four hours. Bored out of his skull , he brews himself a cup of coffee and goes into the balcony. He has this strange feeling that he is being watched. He glances at the opposite balcony and the lights there go out almost as if the person there has guessed that he has noticed it.

Another routine day and he is again bored of studying. But now he is prepared, he has his binoculars handy. At 1 am he sets up position. Himself in darkness he observes the opposite apartment.

That is when he sees her. She raises her head from her books and his heart skips a bit. She is so beautiful, he cannot even begin to comprehend it. He observes her for a while.
Next thing he knows, sunlight is streaming into his room.

“Shit, I’m late” he thinks and rushes to the bathroom.

Another day and Amit is back at his studies. He kind of given up on a job but he is really is into this MBA thing.
Interestingly, he is getting into some kind of competition with this girl. She is studying, he knows she is studying, she knows he is studying and she knows that he knows that she is studying. But for the life of him, he does not know what she is studying.

And his heart still skips a beat every time he sees her, and that is happening almost everyday. The good news is that his night mares have stopped. The competition usually ends with him falling asleep on his table and waking up in broad daylight.

This goes on for two months. He is now really studying hard, whether to secure his future or to impress the girl he does not know. Anyway he is enjoying it a lot.

Its 3 weeks to the CAT and one morning the lights in her apartment do not come on. He is worried, he cannot concentrate and messes up the mock test he is taking. “Maybe she is ill or something “he tells himself. But the lights do not come on again and he does not see her again.

“I need to see her again”, he thinks “Just once before the CAT , just for good luck”, but it is not to be.

It is D –day, he goes to the centre, somehow goes through the test. He does not know how he has done and does not really care.

It is back to the same grind and same old routine for him. The nightmares have started again and he has kind of given up on life.

It has been 2 months since the exams. He is pining for the girl he never knew. He knows it is stupid but cannot help it. He is back in his apartment. That is when he sees the white envelope.” Not another job interview” he thinks. But no it is an interview call from Department of Management Studies, IIT Delhi.

“At last “he thinks “some recognition for my efforts” and goes back to studying.

Two months late he has secured a position in DMS IIT Delhi. He bids good bye to Mumbai ,the city that had given him so much and had made him weep so much.

First day in college is kind of boring. He still remembers her but the memory is kind of fading.” I can live without her “he tells himself and decides to bury the past baggage. The Dean’s address over he hangs out with some new friends.

Second day in college , first class of finance , he is apprehensive .Being an engineer , finance never was his thing.

Next thing he knows, his heart has skipped a beat .He thinks he is dreaming, but no, a girl, the same girl has entered the class. She is heading straight for him.

Sitting next to him she asks in a really calm voice “So, what took you so long?”

He smiles, she smiles, a really pretty smile, with a crooked tooth and all.

That is when he knows everything is going to be all right

Divine Plan

2005-04-25T10:13:00.000-07:00

At a fund raising dinner for a school that serves learning-disabled children, the father of one of the school's students delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended.

After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he offered a question.

"Everything God does is done with perfection. Yet, my son, Shay, cannot learn things as other children do. He cannot understand things as other children do. Where is God's plan reflected in my son?"

The audience was stilled by the query. The father continued. "I believe," the father answered, "that when God brings a child like Shay into the world, an opportunity to realize the Divine Plan presents itself. And it comes in the way people treat that child."

Then, he told the following story: Shay and his father had walked past a park where some boys Shay knew were playing baseball. Shay asked, "Do you think they will let me play?" Shay's father knew that most boys would not want him on their team. But the father understood that if his son were allowed to play it would give him a much-needed sense of belonging.

Shay's father approached one of the boys on the field and asked if Shay could play The boy looked around for guidance from his teammates.

Getting none, he took matters into his own hands and said, "We are losing by six runs, and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him up to bat in the ninth inning."

In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shay's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. At the top of the ninth inning, Shay put on a glove and played in the outfield. Although no hits came his way, he was obviously ecstatic just to be on the field, grinning from ear to ear as his father waved to him from the stands.

In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shay's team scored again. Now, with two outs and bases loaded, the potential winning run was on base. Shay was scheduled to be the next at-bat. Would the team actually let Shay bat at this juncture and give away their chance to win the game?

Surprisingly, Shay was given the bat. Everyone knew that a hit was all but impossible because Shay didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, much less connect with the ball. However, as Shay stepped up to the plate, the pitcher moved a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shay could at least be able to make contact. The first pitch came and Shay swung clumsily and missed..

The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly toward Shay. As the pitch came in, Shay swung at the ball and hit a slow ground ball to the pitcher. The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could easily have thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shay would have been out and that would have ended the game.

Instead, the pitcher took the ball and threw it on a high arc to right field, far beyond reach of the first baseman. Everyone started yelling, "Shay, run to first. Run to first." Never in his life had Shay ever made it to first base. He scampered down the baseline, wide-eyed and startled.

Everyone yelled "Run to second, run to second!" By the time Shay was rounding first base, the right fielder had the ball. He could have thrown the ball to the second baseman for a tag. But the right fielder understood what the pitcher's intentions had been, so he threw the ball high and far over the third baseman's head.

Shay ran toward second base as the runners ahead of him deliriously circled the bases toward home. As Shay reached second base, the opposing shortstop ran to him, turned him in the direction of third base, and shouted, "Run to third!" As Shay rounded third, the boys from both teams were screaming, "Shay! Run home!"

Shay ran home, stepped on home plate and was cheered as the hero for hitting a "grand slam" and winning the game for his team. "That day," said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, "the boys from both teams helped bring a piece of the Divine Plan into this world."

Down the memory lane

2005-04-25T09:00:00.000-07:00

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him.

He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall.

She watches as he wiped a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee,” What’s the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room,

“Why are you down here at this time of night?”

The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?" he asks solemnly.

"Yes, I do" she replies.

The husband paused. The words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car?"

"Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continued. "Do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said,’ Either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for 20 years?"

“I remember that too" she replied softly.

He wiped another tear from his cheek and said,
>>
>>
>>
>> "I would have got free today!!!

Indo-Pak cold war

2005-04-13T11:56:00.000-07:00

During the Cold War, if USA launched a nuke-loaded missile, Soviet satellites would inform the Soviet army in 3 seconds and in less than 45 seconds Soviet counter-missiles woul d be on their way. Recent studies commissioned by US department of Defense included one on nuclear war between India and Pakistan.

This was their scenario.................

The Pakistan army decides to launch a nuke-missile towards India. They don't need any permission from their government, and promptly order the countdowns. Indian technology is highly advanced. In less than 8 seconds, Indian army detects the Pak countdown and decides to launch a missile in retribution.

But they need permission from the Government of India. They submit their request to the Indian President. The President forwards it to the Cabinet.

The Prime Minister calls an emergency Lok Sabha session.

The LS meets, but due to several walkouts and severe protests by the opposition, it gets adjourned indefinitely. The President asks for a quick decision. In the mean time, the Pak missile failed to take off due to technical failure. Their attempts for a relaunch are still on.

Just then the Indian ruling party is reduced to a minority because a party that was giving outside support withdraws it. The President asks the PM to prove his majority within a week. As the ruling party fails to win the confidence vote, a caretaker government is installed.

The caretaker PM decides to permit the armed forces to launch a nuclear missile. But the Election Commission says that a caretaker government can not take such a decision because elections are at hand. A Public Interest Litigation is filed in the Supreme Court alleging misuse of power by the Election Commission.

The Supreme Court comes to the rescue of the PM, and says the acting PM is authorized to take this decision in view of the emergency facing the nation.

Just then one of the Pak missiles successfully took off, but it fell

367 miles away from the target, on its own government building at 11.00AM.

Fortunately there were no casualties as no employee had reached the office that early. In any case, the nuclear core of the missile had detached somewhere in flight.

The Pakistan army is now trying to get better technologies from China and USA. The Indian Government, taking no chances, decides to launch a nuclear missile of its own, after convening an all-party meeting. This time all the parties agree.

Its three months since the army had sought permission.

But as preparations begin, "pro-humanity", "anti-nuclear" activists come out against the Government's decision.

Human chains are formed and Rasta rokos organised.

In California and Washington endless e-mails are sent to Indians condemning the government and mentioning "Please forward it to as many Indians as possible".

On the Pakistan side, the missiles kept malfunctioning. Some missiles deviate from target due to technical failures or high-speed wind blowing over Rajasthan.

Many of them land in the Indian Ocean killing some fishes.

A missile (smuggled from USA) is pressed into service. Since the Pakistan army is unable to understand its software, it hits it original destination: Russia.

Russians successfully intercepts the missile and in retaliation launches a nuclear missile towards Islamabad.

The missile hits the target and creates havoc. Pakistan cries for help.

India expresses deep regrets for what has happened and sends in a million dollars worth of Parle-G biscuits.

Thus India never gets to launch the missile.

Pakistan never gets it right.

And we live happily ever after!!!!

JAI HIND...

Handsome Prince

2005-04-13T11:47:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time there was a Prince who, through no fault of his own was cast under a spell by an evil witch. The curse was that thePrince could speak only one word each year. However, he could save up the words so that if he did not speak for a whole year, then the following year he was allowed to speak two words. (This was before the time of letter writing or sign language.)

One day he met a beautiful princess (ruby lips, golden hair, sapphire eyes,) and fell madly in love. With the greatest difficulty he decided to refrain from speaking for two whole years so that he could look at her and say"my darling".But at the end of the two years he wished to tell her that he loved her. Because of this he waited three more years without speaking (bringing the total number of silent years to 5).But at the end of these five years he realized that he had to askher to marry him. So he waited ANOTHER four years without speaking. Finally as the ninth year of silence ended, his joy knew no bounds. Leading the lovely princess to the most secluded and romantic place in that beautiful royal garden the prince heaped a hundred red roses on her lap, knelt before her, and taking her hand in his, said huskily, "My darling,I love you! Will you marry me?"

And the princess tucked a strand of golden hair behind a dainty ear, opened her sapphire eyes in wonder, and parting her ruby lips,
said:

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scroll down......

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......Well, guess what she said ..........

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......come on, guess what could she have

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said..............

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...........well, she said..............

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"Pardon?"

One flaw in women

2005-04-13T11:12:00.000-07:00

By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his
sixth day of working overtime.

An angel appeared and said, "Why are you spending so
much time on this one?"

And the Lord answered, "Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers, have a lap that can hold four children at one time, have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart-and she will do everything with only two hands."

The angel was astounded at the requirements. "Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model? That's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."

But I won't," the Lord protested. "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days."

The angel moved closer and touched the woman. "But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea that she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.

The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."

The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek. Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, "that's a tear!"

"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride."

The angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."

And she is! Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left. They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart. Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you. The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY OFTEN FORGET THEIR WORTH AND THAT
THEY LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY!!!!

Mother In Law

2005-04-06T01:13:00.000-07:00

A young Indian man excitedly tells his mother he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married. He says, "Just for fun, Ma, I'm going to bring over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The mother agrees.

The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.He then says, "Okay Ma, guess which one I'm going to marry."

She immediately replies, "The one on the right."

"That's amazing, Ma. You're right. How did you know?"

The Indian mother replies, "I don't like her."

Quick Thinking

2005-04-05T21:31:00.000-07:00

A boy worked in the produce section of the supermarket. A man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man was persistent. The boy said he'd go ask his manager what to do.

The boy walked into the back room and said, "There's some jerk out there who wants to buy only half a head of lettuce."

As he finished saying this he turned around to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, "And this gentleman wants to buy the other half."

The manager okayed the deal. Later the manager said to the boy, "You almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it.

You think on your feet,and we like that around here. Where are you from,son?"

The boy replied, "Minnesota, sir."

"Oh really? Why did you leave Minnesota?" asked the manager.

The boy replied, "They're all just prostitutes and hockey players up there."

"My wife is from Minnesota," the manager said.

The boy replied, "Really!? Which team did she play for?" :-)

Grandfather

2005-04-05T07:28:00.000-07:00

A Bihari hat-seller who was passing by a forest decided to
take a nap under one of the trees, so he left his whole basket of hats
by
the side.

A few hours later, he woke up and realized that all his hats were
gone.

He looked up and to his surprise, the tree was full of monkeys and
they had taken all his hats. The Bihari sits down and thinks of how
he
can get the hats down.

While thinking he started to scratch his head. The next moment, the
monkeys were doing the same. Next, he took down his own hat, the
monkeys did exactly the same. An idea came to him, he took his hat
and threw it on the floor and the monkeys did that too. So he finally
managed to get all his
hats back.

Fifty years later, his grandson, Laloo, also became a hat-seller and
had
heard this monkey story from his grandfather. One day, just like his
grandfather, he passed by the same forest. It was very hot,
and he took a nap under the same tree and left the hats on the floor.
He woke up and realized that all his hats were taken by the monkeys on
the
tree. He remembered his grand father's words, started scratching his
head
and the monkeys followed. He took down his hat and fanned himself and
again the monkeys followed. Now, very convinced of his grandfather's
idea,
Laloo
threw his hat on the floor but to his surprise, the monkeys still held
on
to all the hats. Then one monkey climbed down the tree, grabbed the
hat on
the floor, gave him a slap and said .......................

................................

........................

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.......

........

Guess What????????

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.......................

..................

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..............

............

..........

.......

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"You think only you have a grandfather?"

Timely Scream

2005-04-05T07:24:00.000-07:00

Two men dressed in pilot's uniforms walk up the aisle of the airplane. Both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the other is tapping his way along the aisle with a cane.

Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes and the engines start up.

The passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this is just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming.

The plane moves faster and faster down the runway and the people sitting in the window seats realize they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport territory.

As it begins to look as though the plane will plough into the water, panicked screams fill the cabin.

At that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon all retreat into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

In the cockpit, one of the blind pilots turns to the other and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they're gonna scream too late and we're all gonna die."

Jones - The spy

2005-04-05T06:58:00.000-07:00

During the Second World War an American secret service agent was sent to Wales to pick up some very sensitive information from an agent called Jones. His instructions were to walk around town using a code phrase until he met his fellow agent.

He found himself on a desolate country road and where he ran into a farmer.

"Hello," said the agent, "I'm looking for a man called Jones."

"Well you're in luck boy-o," said the farmer, "there's lots of folk named Jones 'round here. There's Jones the butcher, Jones the baker, Jones the blacksmith, why even my name is Jones."

"Aha," thought the agent, "this could be my man." So he whispered the secret code.

"The sun is shining... the grass is growing... the cows are ready for milking."

"Oh," said the farmer, "you're looking for Jones the spy."

How to get a nice wife?

2005-03-27T02:51:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer: No I havent taken the pains to compose this. As usual found this in my inbox.

- Dheepak Ra

Here goes nothing..............

There are times in a person's life when he needs to take crucial decisions on his own. Marriage is one of them. Believe me, the decision on whom to marry is the most important decision a person will make in his life. After marriage, your wife is the most important person in your life. She can make or break your life. The mere thought of this is very frightening.

Some of the questions that crop up are -

a.. What sort of a girl do I marry?
b.. Will she adjust in my family?
c.. How can I decide on a girl by just meeting her for a few times?
d.. When should I get married?
e.. This is my life. So, I should choose the girl I marry, but then what if I make a mistake? .. so on and so forth.

I will try to address these & many more questions in the following sections.

The Nine Rules of Arranged marriage

Rule 1 - Magic no. 28

In an ideal scenario, a girl goes to college at the age of 18. By the time she graduates, goes for her post graduation and/ or works for 1-2 years, she will be about 23- 24. This means that she has spent about 5 years away from her home. In the 5 years period, she would meet many smart guys at college or during her first few years on job. So, in all probability it would be difficult to find a good girl older than 24 yrs. Secondly, in Indian families there is lot of pressure on the girl's to get married by the time they become 24-25.

Statistics says that there is a generation gap after every 5 years. So, in such scenario, one would prefer to marry a girl who is about 3-4 years younger to you. Thus, working backwards, an ideal age for a guy to get married is by 28. Earlier the marriage, the better it is.

Well, as we all know, in the current market scenario, there will never be stability in our career. So, I believe there is no such thing as, "I will marry when I settle down".

Rule 2 -- Subset of marriage-able girls

At times you hear statements like, "I am not getting the right match, I will look after 3 months, I will find a better match then". Well the truth is otherwise. The subset of unmarried girl looking for a match is fixed. From this subset, there would be girls who would get married & there would be new girls added who would be looking for a match. The net result is that at any given time, the variety & number of marriage-able girls are fixed.

Rule 3 - Competition for girls

Like all other facets of life, there is lot of competition for good girls. So, if you are looking for a girl who is post graduate, done her Engg, is working, very beautiful, smart, from a good family etc. etc, just think again. There are other guys who are also looking for similar girls & probably they are better off than you in terms of career, looks personality etc. Given a choice every guy would like to marry Aishwarya Rai. So, set your expectations accordingly.

Rule 4 -- Understanding girls

You would have met a lot of people during your life. As we all know, its difficult to judge a person based on a few meetings. I am sure you would agree with me that in case of girls it is even more difficult to understand them in a few meetings. I know people who are still trying to understand their wife. ;-).. Understanding your spouse is a life long assignment. So, then how do you select a girl based on a few meeting? This is where you need to take the help of your parents/ friends & latest technologies like email/chat to choose your girl.

Rule 5 - Society expectation

The selection process is tough on every one who is involved in the process. In arranged marriage, involvement of family & society is pretty high. You can't meet a girl 3-4 times & then say no to her. It is bad for her future. So, you should have a good short-listing criterion. Meet only a few girls & be sure what you are looking for. It is for the benefit of everyone involved.

Rule 6 -- Marriage between equals

Unlike love marriage, in arranged marriage you also marry into the girl's family. In arranged marriages, family support plays a major role in ensuring a successful marriage. This is where the compatibility of social status, family values & caste/religion plays a major role. Its important to note that in case there is a perfect match between the two families, the marriage is destined to succeed.

Rule 7 - Know yourself

Unlike love marriage, in arranged marriage you first marry a person & then fall in love. So, it's very important that you do a self-assessment on the kind of person you would love. They say, "Opposite attract", while they also say, "Bird of same feather flock together". So, you take a call on what sort of person you like. Take a pen & paper; write down the kind of attributes you are looking for in a girl. Say, she should ideally have the looks of Sonia, the style of Monica, the voice of Sheena, the patience of Rashmi. You will certainly not find the perfect girl, but then you would have a good idea of what you are looking for. The secret here is to set some minimum criteria for selection. Don't forget rule no.3 here.

Rule 8 -- Girl's Beauty

A girl's looks attract, but then no one wants to end up marrying a dumb It is like buying your bike. When you initially buy it, you are crazy about the looks, but later on you love it for its reliability, fuel economy & comfort level. Similarly, a girl's looks are important, but then it should not be the most important criteria. Later on in life, you will get bored of her looks. It is then that her personality & behavior will make all the difference to your marriage. I am sure your parents will be able to advice you a lot better on this topic.

Rule 9 -- Taking advice

As I have mentioned in the next rule, it's very important that the final decision on whom to marry must necessarily be yours. However, don't do the mistake of isolating yourself from the world while planning your marriage. Discuss with your parents & very close friends on this issue. They are your well wishers. Secondly, in such important matters its necessary that you analyze all possibilities. Remember, I am not suggesting that you follow others' advice, but don't forget to take their advice.

Rule 10 -- Own decision

All said & done, it's your marriage & your life that is at stake. Once you are married, you & your wife are the only persons who will be facing the music. Don't marry a girl just because your parents or friends asked you to do so. After marriage, if things don't work out & you end up saying, "It's because of my friends or my parents that I married you", then your marriage is destined for disaster. If the girl is of your choice, it is you who will be responsible for whatever happens. That's when the marriage works out perfectly. So, ensure that you marry the girl of your choice.

How to approach the selection process?

From the day, a person decides to get married; the selection process takes a minimum of 3 months. The whole process needs a lot of patience & commitment. The ideal steps to be followed are:

a.. Definition phase –

Define the minimum criteria for the kind of life partner you are looking for in terms of education, physical appearance, social status, family values, future career plans. Remember the Rule 3 here.

b.. Lead Generation phase –

Place ads in various newspapers, magazines, websites, through friends, family friends, family societies & association etc. You need to exhaust all possible means of getting bio-datas at one go. Remember the Rule 2 here.

c.. Short listing phase –

Based on your selection criteria, short-list the interesting bio-datas. The general process followed for correspondence is as follows:

1. The initiator sends a one page profile of himself/herself.

2. Based on the profile, the receiver sends his/her one page profile along with request for detailed profile, photo, horoscope.

3. The initiator then sends the requested information along with a request for similar information.

4. The receiver send similar information.

5. If the bio-data is selected, it is passed over to the next phase.

A.. Casual interaction phase –

Based on short listing, about 7 to 10 bio-datas are taken forwarded to this phase. The next step to follow here is to exchange email/ chat ids. The guy & the girl then interact for 10 - 15 days to try & judge mutual compatibility through email/chat.

B.. Family interaction phase –

Based on the earlier phase, about 5 leads are taken for consideration in this phase. During this phase, the parents get involved & check the background information about the families to find mutual compatibility.

C.. The dating phase –

Based on the earlier phase about 3 leads are taken forward to this phase. During this phase, the guy & the girl interact by going out alone for 2-3 times. The guy needs to prepare a set of simple questions like who is your favorite star, what are your hobbies? He needs to use his judgment to analyze the girl based on her responses.

D.. The D-day phase –

Finally, the D-day comes when the guy has to select the girl he wants to spend his life with. If the process if followed systematically, there will be no ambiguity in deciding who should be your life partner.

Finally, my dear friends, marriage is all about compromises. In spite of all the planning that you do, there are a lot of uncertainties in a marriage. In fact this is the best part about marriage. Just remember that the person you marry must be of your choice. In such case, there would be no going back for both of you.

A few words of advice: To make your marriage a success; just believe in the age-old virtue, "Never do anything to others that you don't like for yourself".

A boy with roses

2005-03-22T20:38:00.000-08:00

There was a boy in high school we will call Joey.

One day Joey leaned over to the girl sitting next to him in class and whispered, "Red
roses."

The shocked girl stood up, slapped Joey in the face and went crying to
the teacher. The teacher called Joey to the desk and asked what he had
said.
"Red roses" was Joey's reply, at which the teacher screamed and sent
Poor Joey to the principal's office.

As Joey waited in the lobby to be called in, he pondered what was
Happening to him. His thoughts where cut short by the sound of the
secretary saying he could go in. Joey walked into the office and was
told to take a seat, which he did. After telling the story of how he had
been wrongly accused and how he knew there was some mistake, the
principal smiled and asked, "OK, Joey, I understand. What did you say to
her?" Joey was sure the principal would be a reasonable man and
responded "Red roses." you could watch as the principal turned red and
shouted "YOU'RE EXPELLED! GET OUT!"

Joey asked to wait for the bus to take him home, since he lived some distance away. "NO!" Then Joey was informed that if he were caught on the premises again, he would
be arrested for trespassing.

Very distraught, Joey set out on his way home. He had made it about a
Mile down the road when Old Man Jones, the local pig farmer, stopped and
ffered a ride home. Joey, being very upset, of course, accepted the
ride. Not morethan a mile down the road, Old Man Jones asked why Joey
wasn't in school, so Joey told the story of the events that had happened
that day. At the end of the story, the old man said that it sounded like
Joey had quite a rough time of it "Oh, and what did you say?" Joey
hesitated-- should he tell the man what he said, or not? He decided to
tell him. "Red roses." The tires squealed as the truck ground to a halt.
Old Man Jones reached over and opened the door and pushed Joey out on
his ear.

Now very angry, Joey got up, brushed himself off, and continued on his
way home. Upon arriving at home, Joey's mother, Mrs. Campbell, saw that
her son wasn't looking too good, and asked why he hadn't caught the
bus. Joey told her. She fixed Joey a bowl of soup and then asked, "Joey,
dear, what on earth did you say to that little girl?" Joey wasn't sure
what to do. He knew his mother loved him, but he didn't want her to have
the same reaction everyone else had. But he told her anyway. "Red roses." Joey waited in his room with a bruised ego and a sore bottom, wondering what would
happen when his father got home. Six o'clock came around and Joey's
father got home. He could hear his parents arguing outside his door and
then suddenly it was quiet. Mr.. Campbell came into the room and said,
"Your mother told me you had some trouble at school, but I told her you
and I would figure it out."But the first thing is you have to tell me what you said." "OK, Dad, I said red roses'," was Joey's response. "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE, YOU"RE NO SON OF MINE!"

The next morning, Joey decided he needed to get a job. It was awhile
Before he found anyone who would hire a 15-year-old who had been
expelled from high school and kicked out of the house. But Joey wasn't a
quitter, and he did find a job working at a gas station in a
neighboring town. After a few months, Joey had managed to get settled in
his new job and had even moved into the apartment over his boss' garage.
On a particularly slow day at work Joey's boss asked what had happened
that caused everything that had happened to happen. Joey went into along
story of emotional stress,misunderstood youth, the pain of having lost
all of his friends and family in one fateful day. The tale Joey spun was
so powerful;his boss was moved to tears and, out of compassion, offered to adopt Joey. With the first smile to cross his lips in months, Joey accepted. On the way to the
courtproceedings a few days later, Joey's boss asked him, "Exactly, what

did you say to her?" Without thinking, Joey replied, "Red roses." His
boss grew as white as a ghost and said, "That was my niece, you little
pervert!"

Once again, Joey was without a friend in the world. The next day Joey
Took all the money he had managed to save and bought a bus ticket "to
Wherever the farthest place from here is." As he waited for his bus, a
little old lady sat down next to him on the bench. Even though he didn't
want to, she started talking, and before you knew it, she had heard
almost the whole story. But she interrupted and asked what he had said.
"Ma'am, I said 'red roses'." Well, the words were just barely out of his
mouth when she started beating him with her cane. In order to flee the
fury of the old woman, he ran across the road, but he never made it to
the other side. He was hit by a speeding Mack truck and he died.

The moral of this story is:
Always look both ways before crossing the street.

Links 4 U

2005-03-02T11:17:00.000-08:00

Here is a list of sites which you shouldnt miss:

You get this when you mix the sound track of Rambo movie with the CNN video of Iraq war. Rambo in Iraq

You can spend loads and loads of time out here. Particularly check out the quick links to the right. Satire Wire

A take on Bush An appeal to all Canadians

For wanna b chef like me Cooking for Engineers

The 100 best pictures from NGC National Geographic Channel

Priceless

2005-03-02T11:10:00.000-08:00

Updated on Apr 11 2005:
Thanks to Anony(refer to comments), we now have the source for this wonderful article - Its all relative by VijiRaghunathan.

Here is the story:
Grandmother was pretending to be lost in prayer, but her prayer-beads were spinning at top speed. That meant she was either excited or upset. Mother put the receiver down. "Some American girl in his office, she's coming to stay with us for a week." She sounded as if she had a deep foreboding. Father had no such doubt. He knew the worst was to come. He had been matching horoscopes for a year, but my brother Vivek had found a million excuses for not being able to visit India, call any of the chosen Iyer girls, or in any other way advance father's cause. Father always wore four parallel lines of sacred ash on his forehead. Now there were eight, so deep were the furrows of worry on his forehead. I sat in a corner, supposedly lost in a book, but furiously text-messaging my brother with a vivid description of the scene before me.

A few days later I stood outside the airport with father. He tried not to look directly at any American woman going past, and held up the card reading "Barbara". Finally a large woman stepped out, waved wildly and shouted "Hiiii! Mr. Aayyyezh, how ARE you?" Everyone turned and looked at us. Father shrank visibly before my eyes. Barbara took three long steps and covered father in a tight embrace. Father's jiggling out of it was too funny to watch. I could hear him whispering "Shiva shiva!". She shouted "you must be Vijaantee?" "Yes, Vyjayanthi" I said with a smile. I imagined little half-Indian children calling me "Vijaantee aunty!". Suddenly, my colorless existence in Madurai had perked up. For at least the next one week, life promised to be quite exciting.

Soon we were eating lunch at home. Barbara had changed into an even shorter skirt. The low neckline of her blouse was just in line with father's eyes. He was glaring at mother as if she had conjured up Barbara just to torture him. Barbara was asking "You only have vegetarian food? Always??" as if the idea was shocking to her. "You know what really goes well with Indian food, especially chicken? Indian beer!" she said with a pleasant smile, seemingly oblivious to the apoplexy of the gentleman in front of her, or the choking sounds coming from mother. I had to quickly duck under the table to hide my giggles.

Everyone tried to get the facts without asking the one question on all our minds: What was the exact nature of the relationship between Vivek and Barbara? She brought out a laptop computer. "I have some pictures of Vivek" she said. All of us crowded around her. The first picture was quite innocuous. Vivek was wearing shorts, and standing alone on the beach. In the next photo, he had Barbara draped all over him. She was wearing a skimpy bikini and leaning across, with her hand lovingly circling his neck. Father got up, and flicked the towel off his shoulder. It was a gesture we in the family had learned to fear. He literally ran to the door and went out. Barbara said "It must be hard for Mr. Aayyezh. He must be missing his son." We didn't have the heart to tell her that if said son had been within reach, father would have lovingly wrung his neck.

My parents and grandmother apparently had reached an unspoken agreement. They would deal with Vivek later. Right now Barbara was a foreigner, a lone woman, and needed to be treated as an honored guest. It must be said that Barbara didn't make that one bit easy. Soon mother wore a perpetual frown. Father looked as though he could use some of that famous Indian beer.

Vivek had said he would be in a conference in Guatemala all week, and would be off both phone and email. But Barbara had long lovey-dovey conversations with two other men, one man named Steve and another named Keith. The rest of us strained to hear every interesting word. "I miss you!" she said to both. She also kept talking with us about Vivek, and about the places they'd visited together. She had pictures to prove it, too. It was all very confusing.

This was the best play I'd watched in a long time. It was even better than the day my cousin ran away with a Telugu Christian girl. My aunt had come howling through the door, though I noticed that she made it to the plushest sofa before falling in a faint. Father said that if it had been his child, the door would have been forever shut in his face. Aunt promptly revived and said "You'll know when it is your child!" How my aunt would rejoice if she knew of Barbara!

On day five of her visit, the family awoke to the awful sound of Barbara's retching. The bathroom door was shut, the water was running, but far louder was the sound of Barbara crying and throwing up at the same time. Mother and grandmother exchanged ominous glances. Barbara came out, and her face was red. "I don't know why", she said, "I feel queasy in the mornings now." If she had seen as many Indian movies as I'd seen, she'd know why. Mother was standing as if turned to stone. Was she supposed to react with the compassion reserved for pregnant women? With the criticism reserved for pregnant unmarried women? With the fear reserved for pregnant unmarried foreign women who could embroil one's son in a paternity suit? Mother, who navigated familiar flows of married life with the skill of a champion oarsman, now seemed completely taken off her moorings. She seemed to hope that if she didn't react it might all disappear like a bad dream.

I made a mental note to not leave home at all for the next week. Whatever my parents would say to Vivek when they finally got a-hold of him would be too interesting to miss. But they never got a chance. The day Barbara was to leave, we got a terse email from Vivek. "Sorry, still stuck in Guatemala. Just wanted to mention, another friend of mine, Sameera Sheikh, needs a place to stay. She'll fly in from Hyderabad tomorrow at 10am. Sorry for the trouble."

So there we were, father and I, with a board saying "Sameera". At last a pretty young woman in salwar-khameez saw the board, gave the smallest of smiles, and walked quietly towards us. When she did 'Namaste' to father, I thought I saw his eyes mist up. She took my hand in the friendliest way and said "Hello, Vyjayanthi, I've heard so much about you." I fell in love with her. In the car father was unusually friendly. She and Vivek had been in the same group of friends in Ohio University. She now worked as a Child Psychologist.

She didn't seem to be too bad at family psychology either. She took out a shawl for grandmother, a saree for mother and Hyderabadi bangles for me. "Just some small things. I have to meet a professor at Madurai university, and it's so nice of you to let me stay" she said. Everyone cheered up. Even grandmother smiled. At lunch she said "This is so nice. When I make sambar, it comes out like chole, and my chole tastes just like sambar". Mother was smiling. "Oh just watch for 2 days, you'll pick it up." Grandmother had never allowed a muslim to enter the kitchen. But mother seemed to have taken charge, and decided she would bring in who ever she felt was worthy. Sameera circumspectly stayed out of the puja room, but on the third day, I was stunned to see father inviting her in and telling her which idols had come to him from his father. "God is one" he said. Sameera nodded sagely.

By the fifth day, I could see the thought forming in the family's collective brains. If this fellow had to choose his own bride, why couldn't it be someone like Sameera? On the sixth day, when Vivek called from the airport saying he had cut short his Gautemala trip and was on his way home, all had a million things to discuss with him. He arrived by taxi at a time when Sameera had gone to the University. "So, how was Barbara's visit?" he asked blithely. "How do you know her?" mother asked sternly. "She's my secretary" he said. "She works very hard, and she'll do anything to help." He turned and winked at me. Oh, I got the plot now! By the time Sameera returned home that evening, it was almost as if her joining the family was the elders' idea. "Don't worry about anything", they said, "we'll talk with your parents."

On the wedding day a huge bouquet arrived from Barbara.
"Flight to India - $1500.
Indian kurta - $5.
Emetic to throw up - $1.
The look on your parents' faces - priceless" it said.

Copyright

2005-03-02T11:07:00.000-08:00

Another reason for forking this, is to explicitly post all email forwards which may not be in the public domain.

I herein admit and explicitly declare that none of the postings in this blog is my creation. The best forward of the day, will find a place here.

Yet another blog?

2005-03-02T10:41:00.000-08:00

My original scrap book - Baejaar was getting cluttered. In an attempt to stream line it, I have forked out this blog to contain interesting links or may be some interesting text email forwards.

So if you want to while away some time, then this should be the blog for you.

I am even thinking of making this blog - open source, so that whenever somebody comes across a nice site, they can post it to this repository. Lets see......